practice

just dickin around. these suck.

"A cheap person will be cheap with his feelings"

Says my aunt. (We were talking about her several ex's, not about Kevin, but I will go into this later.)

I respect my aunt very much; she has been through a lot in her life, but she doesn't know what she is talking about. Of course the first question when she learned I had a boyfriend (thanks, Dad, for keeping the Israelis up to date on my life), was about his religion. And anything but "Jewish" is the wrong answer, naturally. Then it went on to "How do your parents feel about this?" Ugh. And "How do you feel about this?" which I can't answer in a sentence. I told her I love him. That's the easy answer. I obviously wouldn't be with him now if it was my #1 priority. And I think I can say that the ONLY reason it would EVER be a #1 priority is so that I can answer these questions from various family members with less anxiety... in which case, I would be doing it for so many OTHER people, but not for myself... which I do not agree with.

She responded with "Love isn't everything." She doesn't know what she is talking about. She told my mom and I a story ("Michelle, pay attention") about her first love, who wasn't ready for marriage, but her mother was encouraging her for marriage, and he went off to school and then more school in Italy, and meanwhile she married and had a kid before she say him again. And still today when/if she sees him (maybe a few times since then), her heart sinks. She wonders what would be if she had married him. And I hear that he wonders too. And I hear that regret is an awful feeling.

Apparently she feels better off. Because he is cheap. And she hears his current marriage is having troubles because he is too cheap. Maybe something is lost in translation? I vote that they don't know what love is. Call me a romantic (Srav is rubbing off on me!), but I believe that love conquers all. If you love someone, who loves you, other problems will find solutions. You will work through differences. You will overcome life's struggles. blabhlah. No doubt in my mind.

I also recently learned of a good person in a sour marriage. Basically her husband took away her car, cell, and credit cards for what seems to be no reason (I want to acknowledge my bias source and limited information!). She is stuck at home with 3 children now, while he works. What if there is an emergency? I am not sure of her spending habits previously, but I don't think these actions are leading to an equal relationship, but rather a totalitarian authority. And she stays with him because she loves him. Does she? Does she just love having a husband? Does she just feel stable and comfortable with him, which I will have you all know is part of, but not the only components of true love. (Does she feel stable and comfortable at all?)

Ugh. I say "ugh" to these talks of love! I hate to say it, but as much as I love my family, they do not know me well. What is important to me, what I value and savor and cherish and care for... I do not talk openly about myself... I listen... but perhaps opening my mouth is the only way to increase understanding. I DO preach that communication is key! Emerson, as I always reference, said it is ok to be a hypocrite.

Honestly, I miss Kevin more now than ever. Seeing him once a month is killing me.

Less than 2 weeks!

The Holy Land

I am going to upload a recording tonight, interpreting the videos for the ASL-impaired... (my ASL sucks, and I blame it on almost 2 weeks of limited ASL exposure!)

Driving from the airport to the hotel- night #1.1

ps- hit the audio recording for (shitty) interpretation first, then hit play to see hear it overlap the video.

pps- not only is my ASL falling behind, but also, it is extremely hard for an ASL student to sign with one hand.... good luck understanding this one. Hopefully the later ones will improve after I get used to signing again.

The view from the hotel!- night #1.2

Hot water heaters- night #1.3

the profoundest thing I have heard ever come from the tv show GREEK

there was a moment when Cappie was talking to Spitter, he was helping him cope with the separation between him and his now-ex-girlfriend. He said "relationships either evolve...... or they go extinct... good luck adapting" wait, now I forget what he was talking about, but anyway. that is so true! because if you think about it, there are some friendships that you kinda had, and eventually lost, and then there are ones that last forever. Why? because they evolve. In a good way. In a flourishing way, that makes relationships stronger. ANy relationship, really.

Then they had another episode (or was it that episode?), they had flashbacks to the current seniors' freshman year. How they all met, and before their relationships went sour and got all complicated and confusing. And as the audience member, you kinda assumed there was really more history than you know about. And when you get to see it in a flashback, it makes you appreciate the "current relationship went sour" so much more! Does that make any sense. That's another reason why I love LOST!

from schuman and capone's language development (2010;)

a... key feature of the self-teaching hypothesis is the lexicalization of the phonological recording (share, 1995). young readers initially begin the word recognition process with a basic knowledge of simple letter-sound correspondences that become associated with particular words (i.e., they are "lexicalized"). Children modify these simple one-to-one grapheme-morpheme correspondences by using constraints such as context, word position, and morphological endings (a grapheme is a written symbol [letter] that represents a phoneme [sound]). Share recognized that these initial decoding successes are much different than the decoding of the complex words that skilled readers eventually encounter. nevertheless, according to Share, these early, manageable encounters are enough to kick-start the self-teaching mechanism, which in turn refines itself in light of othorgraphic knowledge. Orthography refers to the way a word is stored visually in one's memory (Torgesen, 2004). The early lexicalization of sound-letter correspondences may best be considered a bootstrap or scaffold for developing the "complex, lexically constrained knowledge of spelling-sound relationships that characterize the expert reader" (share, 1995, p. 165).


THOUGHTS?

Communication is Key

In all honesty, I think that communication and language are of the most fascinating topics in the world. How do we exchange any information? How can you think/feel something and be able to express it; and just the same, how can I receive that message and understand how you think/feel. Freaks me out.

Last night, Kevin told me how happy he was that we were both interested in communication and language (as an aspiring editor). And I couldn't agree more. Clear communication is among the most important things in a relationship and in the world. We are making it our personal duties to assure, encourage, and disseminate efficient communication practices revealing nothing but mutual understanding.

Following Thanksgiving dinner, my cousin introduced me to Ludwig Wittgenstein. He says in his Tractatus:

Now I'm afraid you haven't really got hold of my main contention to which the whole business of logical propositions is only corollary. The main point is the theory of what can be expressed by propositions, i.e., by language (and, which comes to the same thing, what can be thought) and what cannot be expressed by propositions, but only shown; which I believe is the cardinal problem of philosophy.

How cool is that? Ok, so maybe not the most novel of ideas, but I think I like it, whoever said it first means nothing.

But somehow we do understand each other. And I realize now that my fascination with language and communication reveals itself in how I want to know the perspective of who I am talking with. I always ask questions... and how that person feels about whatever... and why... and his experiences... of course I try to shut my mouth if it gets too personal or invasive, but honestly, all of those things really help you understand a person and his perspective. Which ultimately lead you to better understand them in their communication in general.

I was talking with some roommates and friends this weekend. Of various hearing levels, we all have our own communication styles and preferences in various contexts and environments. In any event, I've noticed just how much miscommunication goes on in my house. Oh man it can be a riot. (and also NOT a riot!) It is curious, though, how there is less misunderstanding outside of our home than within. Thoughts?

Gestural System is Being Replaced

As an American Sign Language Learner (aka SL2), you cannnnotttt tell me that your signing has not influenced your communication in English- in the Hearing world. Sometimes, when ASL just seems more appropriate (natural?), it just comes out. At that bar where it seems like wherever you stand, you are next to a speaker... At the museum where you just can't bring yourself to break the silence... At the coffee shop where you see that cute guy you want to talk about... And it just seeps into life where no one has any ASL competence! Just seeps it's way right on through, so that if there is any misunderstanding, I somehow resort to ASL (or what I know of it). For example, there was an Ethiopian girl in the building (someone's daughter) who knows no English. Why was I trying to sign "I'll be right back"?? Beyond this, you will see your whole gestural system start to be replace as your ASL knowledge increases. I find myself signing to myself, the way other hearing people might speak to themselves. I find my self signing when I think, for some reason, it has meaning to others, when really, it only has meaning to myself (Deaf people will tell you that too, haha!)

Anyway, there was this funny short story that my professor told us...
A man is out to lunch and he is reading the menu.... the waiter approaches and asks for his order, "What can I get you for lunch?" and he says, "Oh, tuna" as he signs FISH. Insert ::weird look:: from all parties. Himself included. "How did that get there," I find myself thinking when that happens to me. It just slips right out.