Saturday, January 22, 2011

"You know a lot more than you think you do"

I hear this sentence often. Everyone in my program does. And I believe it, don't get me wrong. Of course it's all relative. I know more than the "average" parent about the typical language development of someone their child's age... whatever "average" means. And I get that I have more knowledge of what's going on in the body related to hearing loss, and how that affects language development, not to mention social-emotional development and the cultural components that you can't ignore. But do I really know anything?

When I talk to non-SLPs or people naive to the Deaf world, I get a lot of respect. "I can see you are really passionate about this!" People understand what I am saying and appreciate my level of sensitivity and concern.
Perhaps this is because I step out of student/SLP/professional mode and step into a casual/informal/sincere mode. I'm noticing it can be a challenge in itself to be professional and confident at the same time. "Not my thing," as I usually say when discussing anything out of my scope of being (i.e. alcohol, sports, cars, etc. ;-)

When I talk to my peers or supervisors or faculty, I fall apart, I guess. A wise friend once said to me, "Fake it til you make it"... referring to confidence, in case you haven't heard that line before. And I honestly try! I walk out of my meetings feeling great, thinking I ask intelligent, provoking questions, thinking I left the impression that I knew what I was doing and expressed an appropriate level of rational thought, creativity, knowledge, depth, consideration, etc. But it seems that without any exception, the truth of the matter is that I walk away, and the supervisors more than likely discuss how I couldn't possibly have been more disappointing.

Okok, well, maybe not that far. I always get positive + negative feedback. Though I think that is an SLP thing. "I like how you said your good /s/ sound on the first one, but I didn't hear it for the next 29 words!" yeayeayea. okok. Again and again, I just get slammed to the floor. This isn't for me, I get it. Story of my life.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

If it helps, you always come across as a very competent and confident person to me! :)

Mac&Cheese said...

Love you.

Unknown said...

Practicing your online American Sign Language skills is important. If it wasnt, why would you have signed up to learn in the first place? Many people new to American Sign Language will seek practice time with individuals from their own community. Many people learning sign language are willing to meet with you on a weekly basis in order to improve your sign language skills and become proficient. Some of you, after learning American Sign Language online, may want to further your aspirations to become an interpreter for the deaf. Being an interpreter for the deaf, you would have the opportunity to help so many people that would need your skills that you learned online. Learning American Sign Language Online can benefit you and your community in endless ways and possibilities.